SGA FIC: Dog Tags Chapter 9
Jan. 3rd, 2008 06:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
x_erikah_xDOG TAGS
By ErikaHK
Title: Dog Tags
Chapter: 9/9
Word count: ~980
Rating: PG13 (language and graphic violent scenes)
Characters: mainly John Sheppard, but also features some Rodney McKay near the end, with appearances of Evan Lorne, Ronon Dex, Teyla Emmagan and Elizabeth Weir.
Genre: Drama, Angst, H/C, Gen
Spoilers: for Sunday
Disclaimer: Stargate and all related characters are the property of MGM Television Entertainment. Not done for profit, just for fun.
Summary: After a team fails to return from a mission, Sheppard goes to find out why and ends up alone lost on an unknown planet with no means to return home. Shep Whump. Set in Season 3 somewhere after Sunday.
A/N: This is the end. I hope I was able to keep you entertained. Thanks for reading all.
…
Chapter 9 and Epilogue
John woke up in the next day after another bad dream. He remained with his eyes closed and remembered the last thing the Dr. Keller said before he fell asleep. The dog tags were delivered to Lorne. Some relief reached his consciousness. He still desperately wanted to know what Rodney was saying the previous day, something about energy surge that caused an explosion. John needed to know the cause of it before he could sleep well.
He then heard Teyla’s soft chuckle and Ronon’s heavy voice and was washed by relief. He opened his eyes and he showed a smile on his face satisfied to see them alive and well. They smiled back overcome by the same feeling towards him.
“John, we are very happy to finally see you awake.” Her smile brightened her face.
“Yes,” came Ronon’s monosyllabic statement.
“I’m glad to be back.”
“How are you feeling?” she asked approaching his bedside.
John adjusted the bed to sit. “My leg hurts a little, but nothing like before.”
“We are very sorry it took us so long to find you, John.”
“Don’t worry, Teyla. You came. I’m here now and I’m fine.” He paused, looking at both. “And so are you.” He looked at the sheet as the room fell silent.
“Dr. Keller said you hit your head and don’t remember what happened.” Ronon said.
“Yes,” John said gloomy. He looked up at both. “Can you guys fill me in?”
“We were rescuing Captain Clark’s team. There was a sudden explosion from a power plant overload which was not detected by the Jumper’s sensors. We were all caught by surprise and were thrown away with the blast’s impact. I was unconscious, but Ronon managed to carry me and help Lorne back to the jumper and Rodney took us back to Atlantis.”
“He thought you were with me when I came back and took off. I tried to warn him, but I passed out too.”
“We do not blame him, though.” Teyla gave a pointed look at Ronon.
So there it was. The simple facts that had him torturing himself to know told in short sentences. The explosion was no one’s fault. “So, that’s what Rodney was talking about.”
“He believes that he should have predicted the explosion and blames himself for leaving you behind. Even though it is not his fault.”
“He’s been driving everyone crazy since it happened.”
“Perhaps… you two should talk?”
John looked at Teyla with the response written in his face. He knew what guilt Rodney carried and he knew it wasn’t a light burden. He simply nodded.
“I will tell him to come to see you the next time you awake. You need to rest now.”
John hated how fast he got tired. “Thanks,” he spoke before they left and slumped back to sleep hoping that the new facts would keep the bad dreams away.
…
Rodney hurried to the infirmary after receiving the message that Sheppard was awake. He paced fast through the corridors of Atlantis and reached the transporter. Rodney took a deep breath and exited the transporter, entering the infirmary. He got closer to his bedside and looked at the dressings all over his arms and leg. He let the silence linger for a few moments.
“Uh, Teyla said you wanted to talk to me.” Rodney lowered his head and took another deep breath. He could do this. “I… I know that you have this leave no man behind thing, and I did leave you behind and…” His voice trailed off.
“Look, Rodney, I don’t really know the circumstances, but it must have been hell. I… I saw the destruction.” He paused. “When an explosion like that happens all one can do is run away as fast as they can before it gets ugly.” He sighed. “And it was ugly.”
Rodney looked back at the pilot. “All I needed to do was look back. Then I would see that you weren’t there and I could go back, but I didn’t.” Rodney was angry at himself.
“It was a mistake. I’m okay now.”
“Is that supposed to make me feel any better?” Rodney sat in the chair beside the bed. “It was ugly. I saw it. I had no idea what it was or what caused it. I still don’t.” Rodney sighed and closed his eyes. “I panicked. I though it could have some kind of fallout.”
“Look, I’m not saying if it was or not your fault. It happened. It’s in the past. Leave it.”
“It doesn’t keep the guilt away.” Rodney had a heavy voice when he said that.
“Guilt is a bitch. It stays with you no matter what anyone says and it always comes back to slap you in the face. Sometimes all you can do not to crumble when it happens is to slap back.” Sheppard spoke with a sincerity that surprised Rodney.
“I promise it will never happen again.” Rodney spoke with determination. It was all he could say to demonstrate his sincere apology. He saw Sheppard’s smile and felt that the huge burden being lifted from his back. He smiled back.
…
Sometimes all you can do not to crumble when it happens is to slap back.
John’s own words echoed in his mind. He stared at the ceiling of the dark infirmary recounting the facts to himself once more. The conversation he had that evening about guilt had John reconsidering his own part at the events. I hadn’t been his fault after all. He wondered what the not-Caldwell hallucination would have to say about that.
“It wasn’t this time.”
John woke up abruptly breathing hard. He looked around and saw himself alone in the dark infirmary. He eased his breathing and closed his eyes, going back to sleep.
The End
A/N: In case you are wondering, the explosion was caused by a self-destruct mechanism. There is no way for the characters to figure that out because of the way the mechanism was projected and how the power plant was designed.
